Reality Check

Well my grand plan for yesterday ended up as a bust. I've been having a fair amount of trouble sleeping lately and Saturday was no exception to that. My boyfriend and I ended up deciding to get breakfast and head out to the new outlet mall that opened up this week. We spent most of the morning walking around checking out the shops. It was really nice and although we only really purchased one thing it was a really nice day.

When we finally made it home I'd been awake for nearly 24 hours so we ate some dinner and I finally fell asleep. I ended up sleeping for a good 8 hours, which meant I woke up at midnight. Not only is this a really weird sleep schedule for a normal person but it's a weird one for a night shifter, so I don't know how I'm going to get this straightened out for when I go back to work on Monday. Plus I skipped my run, in favor of sleep.

I had a particularly rough morning Saturday when I decided to change from my work clothes into regular clothes. Back when I started this decision to lose weight and become healthier I originally weighed 209 and had been near that weight for a long time, however I lost about 35-40 pounds over the course of about 18 months and was looking and feeling much better. My clothes were to big and I never thought I was going back to that size so I took my, 'I'm out of college and earning a really paycheck' bank account and my slimmer self out for a little clothes shopping and got rid of everything that was much to big. It felt great and I loved it. Fast forward to now when I have regained all but about 5 pounds and I find that I have nothing to wear that fits or flatters my body. I know that with hard work and a little time I'll be back into those clothes and someday to little to wear them but it can be very discouraging.

I realize that my weight should not be tied to my enjoyment of events but it does have an impact in ways. I have a few things coming up that I really wish I could just get back down to that 170 range. I want to see the progress but I don't want to do the work though.

I'm going to change my plan for the next week to try to eat up the missed run and I have 2 personal training sessions next week so it's a start. However it's meal time that is truly killing my hope of weight loss. Weight Watchers doesn't seem to work, neither does counting calories. I think that after I run today that in order to really change things, the boyfriend and I are going grocery shopping and I'm going to make all 21 meals and 14 snacks on Sunday and that's exactly what I'll eat for the week.